I should have titled this column Part Three, mistakenly having crafted a three-part series dedicated to Intentional Imbalance.
Having unpacked Intentional Imbalance in the 16 August 2023 edition and Rest and Energy in the 30 August 2023 edition, a challenging life moment after publishing both forced me to realise and reflection the third piece of the puzzle: Support.
The old saying goes, ‘Behind every great man, there’s an incredible woman’, and while this is dated, it is a famous quote for a reason.
If we put gender aside, it implies that behind a successful person is another, or several, supportive people.
My modern-day version of this quote is ‘behind every successful person is an extensive support network who would move heaven and earth to help make dreams come true and bring visions to life’.
I’m not a superwoman.
I never have been, and I never will be.
But I can live the Intentional Imbalance I desire and do it with plenty of downtime because of the support I have at home and from my extended family and friends.
Running small businesses, working on my career, raising three amazing children and volunteering in the areas that bring me joy would not be possible without a supportive partner at home with me, my parents, in-laws, sister, friends and extended family.
Those who go it alone (I’m looking at you, single mothers) have my admiration.
I have no shame in admitting that an exceptionally gifted cleaning professional maintains my home and that an iron-extraordinaire presses my clothes.
I also engage a yard maintenance expert in the absence of goats, seeing as though they’re frowned upon in residential yards.
I know this admission is confronting and controversial in a cost-of-living crisis, but what would I be if I didn’t be me and share honestly?
The recognition that this suits this time of my life.
Where I was five or more years ago, was different, and where I’ll be in the future will be different again.
It was late on a Friday evening when I realised that the third piece to this unexpected trio of columns needed to be written.
I’d arrived home in a taxi, having landed at the airport from Brisbane, where I’d been for work.
I came home to an empty house, which was expected.
My two big children were at Battle of the Bands with my sister at the Pilbeam Theatre, and Nathan and Sara were at a Scout camp.
My Dad had helped across the week, and others in my support network would have as well, had I needed them to.
On this Friday night, I sat while waiting for my frozen leftovers to heat – pumpkin risotto – a favourite of Sara’s I’d made before travelling, and I was in silence.
The orchestra of words for part three presented themselves, and I just had to capture them before they disappeared.
Fuelled by gratitude and a desire to be real, the trio of columns began to come together.
Asking for help can sometimes be hard, but I learnt a long time ago to get over myself and ask anyway.
People genuinely love to help the people they love, and if you reframe your thinking, you realise the immense joy it can bring someone when you ask them for help.
While a person you ask may not be able to help every time, it is the mutual understanding that we are all doing life together, which I hope means each interaction is taken for what it is: A request for help and a yes or no, without judgment or resentment if it is a no in an instance.
When I ran in the Mayoral bi-election in 2021, people came from everywhere to help me.
Distant relatives, acquaintances who then became friends, members of the public who I didn’t know prior and an overwhelming level of support from my family and friends.
My Dad, in particular, told me that if I won, he’d always help with the kids.
Here is where the transparency comes in because ‘behind every great man is an incredible woman’, and that incredible woman for my Dad is my step-mom, Sue.
If it weren’t for Sue, the kids may have been looked after and taxied around, but they wouldn’t be fed.
The hours, days and weeks of commitment that people gave me blew me away, especially the level of commitment my God-parents gave me.
I still haven’t decided if I’ll ever do that again (I know I need to hurry up and make up my mind), but the memories of support make me reflect fondly on that experience.
“Ask for help not because you’re weak, but because you want to remain strong.” – Les Brown.
In this unexpected three-part series on Intentional Imbalance, Rest and Support, I hope it has helped paint the picture that I am just an ordinary girl with an extraordinary support network.
A ‘live wire’ as some would and have said to my face affectionately.
A girl who loves to serve, work hard, rest, play, knows herself and is always exactly where she wants to be – Intentionally Imbalanced.
